|
|
Recent studies show that gnomes may be related to dwarves, known for heavy drinking. If it is gnomes may have a penchance for extreme and dangerous alchoholism. Luckily they have iregularily strong livers, which expands their already short lifespan. All we can hope is that these poor gnomes may have a future in this world, the little mushroom pickers they are. Meanwhile every link to this website from various others gives a gnome a supper. :) 2 septembre
HEY YOU! YOU WANNA BE RICH? OR FAMOUS? THEN THE FIRST STEP IS TO SUBMIT A CRAZY POEM OR SHORT STORY TO lordkalgan@hotmail.com (OR BOTH)AND HEY SEND IN 5 POEMS AND I WILL POST EM. I WILL POST EM ALL!YOU WILL BE FAMOUS!BUT ONE THING - DONT MAKE A POEM THAT WAS MADE BY YOURSELF - SAY U COPY ONE OFF THE WEB I WILL SUE YOUR ASS OFF... SOMEHOW. HERES AN EXAMPLE POEM BY ME.ohhh dunanananaaa superdamario we love you danananananananaaaa
say go kill a goomba stomp some heads
grow a real mustache while sleeping in bed
we all get cra-a-a-azy when we think bout you
all we need too do is play nintendooooo
*super mario theme* 31 août The Mario Saga's One
WHY MARIO DOESNT TALK TO WALUIGI
Mario:so i was like buda-bing buda-boom and he was like me no speak superdamario italiano so i was like speakalee japani so he go chong fu kang and i was like moh-mah-mee-aah. |
| Waluigi:got any pot? Mario:I gotsa the star brand and some of da mushrooms,Itsa crazy business in da mushroom kingdom! Ive even a had to "stompa some heads" if you catches me drift.Waluigi: I have some enchanted life crystals here and a gold star. | Mario:a no sale. Coins and a rupees only.Waluigi:no.... NOOOO! Mario: Me is a thinkin' i hafta stompa some heads.Waluigi:your goin' down with me you bastard! Mario and Waluigi pull out their mithril longswords. Mario: TO THE DEATH!
Waluigi:DIE!!! Waluigi stabs his sword directly at Mario's head, severing his ear. Mario: Stars of the seventh house, i summon ye. Waluigi and Mario gaze at the stars shooting down upon them. Waluigi: Cast Beamra (blatant Final Fantasy cliche). Beams suddenly shoot out of Waluigi's webbed fingers and melts Mario's face. Mario:I hope a the nintendo designers fix a me face up right away! By now the shooting stars are pouring down on Waluigi and he gets on his kart for a quick get away.
Mario: Super a Mario a says YOU DIE! Mario flings a bo-omb(a real live bomb type Mario stocks his warehouse's and restaurant's with) at Waluigi, resulting in Waluigi losing all his limbs. Mario:MUAHAHAHA! Mario strides off into the setting sun......
As soon as Mario was a small dot on the horizon Wario appeared in his Pimpin' purple car with two droids, which carried him off to Wario's secret lab. As soon as the droids arrived Wario's scientists began creating him something... something new....
| Waluigi felt different now,bigger,faster,stronger. His face obscured by a mask his breathing became loud... and quite annoying. He looked at himself in a mirror. Yes, he would be called Darth.. Darth Waluigi,forever hunting Mario,forever bound to the hunt |
|
The effects of steroids....
Before After and of course when u stop using steroids
The Future of Entertainment
Introducing Xbox 360™ from Microsoft®, which delivers the most powerful console, the best games, the next generation of Xbox Live®, and amazing digital entertainment experiences, all unprecedented in home console entertainment.
Xbox 360
Suggested retail price: $399.99*
If you're a serious gamer looking for the ultimate console, the search ends here. Fully loaded, it's the unsurpassed gaming and entertainment experience right out of the box.
We're talking a 20GB detachable hard drive for downloading content and saving games, plus a headset and a wireless controller for instant Xbox Live action. That's on top of the console itself, which not only plays games in high definition (HD) with 720p/1080i output and full surround sound, but can stream digital photos and music from your Windows® XP or Windows® Media Center Edition 2005 PC. Xbox 360 delivers the ultimate digital entertainment and gaming experience.
With its built-in Ethernet port and a free level of the online service, Xbox 360 instantly connects you to Xbox Live. Every Xbox 360 owner is a Silver subscriber—just plug the Ethernet cable into your existing broadband connection and join a global community of more than two million members. Set up a Gamer Profile, visit the Xbox Live Marketplace, even send voice messages—and that's just the beginning. Upgrade to Xbox Live Gold service and experience multiplayer games and tournaments, intelligent matchmaking, voice communication via the Xbox 360 Headset, and much more.
Xbox 360 Core System
Suggested retail price: $299.99*
The Xbox 360 Core System is everything you need to hit the ground running. Plug in the console and the controller and you're playing. Then decide what extras you add and when—it's expandable to the full Xbox 360 experience.
Accessories included with the Xbox 360 |
Accessories included with the Xbox 360 Core System |
|
Xbox 360 Wireless Controller
Enjoy speed, accuracy, and freedom to roam with its 30 foot range. |
|
Xbox 360 Hard Drive (20GB)
Save games and music, plus download new Xbox Live® content.
|
|
Xbox 360 Headset
Trash-talk opponents or discuss strategies with your Xbox Live teammates. |
|
Xbox 360 Component HD AV Cable.
This connects gamers to the world of Xbox 360 games and graphics through high-definition and standard-definition connections.
|
|
Xbox 360 Ethernet Connectivity Cable
Instantly connects gamers to the world of Xbox Live®.
|
|
Xbox 360 Media Remote
Sit back and take control of your console, TV, and DVD/CD playback. Included for a limited time only..
| |
|
|
Xbox 360 Controller
Get in the game with a nine-foot cable and adjustable vibration feedback. |
|
Xbox 360 Composite AV Cable
Connect to the world of Xbox 360 with great next-generation graphics and games through a standard-definition connection.
|
| |
|
|
 |
| Super Cool MMO (massive multiplayer online)
Super Cool Games
Expect more games in the future! Any questions at all about my webpage? Want to link each others webpages for more people to see your webpage? Comments or suggestions? Post it here or otherwise email me at lordkalgan@hotmail.com. I'll get crackin' at that computer. (note: i am neither that fat or ugly as the guy below me) 30 août
Playing Golf
Moses and Jesus were in a threesome playing golf one day. Moses pulled up to the tee and drove a long one. The ball landed in the fairway, but rolled directly toward a water hazard. Quickly Moses raised his club, the water parted and it rolled to the other side, safe and sound.
Next, Jesus strolled up to the tee and hit a nice long one directly toward the same water hazard. It landed right in the centre of the pond and kind of hovered over the water. Jesus casually walked out on the pond and chipped the ball onto the green.
The third guy got up and randomly whacked the ball. It headed out over the fence and into oncoming traffic on a nearby street. It bounced off a truck and hit a nearby tree. From there, it bounced onto the roof of a shack close by and rolled down into the gutter, down the drain spout, out onto the fairway and straight toward the aforementioned pond. On the way to the pond, the ball hit a stone and bounced out over the water onto a lily pad, where it rested quietly. Suddenly a very large bullfrog jumped up on a lily pad and snatched the ball into his mouth. Just then, an eagle swooped down and grabbed the frog and flew away. As they passed over the green, the frog squealed with fright and dropped the ball, which bounced right into the cup for a hole in one.
Moses turned to Jesus and said, "I hate playing with your Dad."
Michael Jackson- Like A Nun
What do Michael and Catholic school nuns have in common?
Both are a pain in the ass to kids.
IRS Genie
A man has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His camel
dies of thirst. He's crawling through the sands, certain that he has breathed
his last, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the sand
several yards ahead of him. He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the
sand, and discovers what looks to be an old brief case.
He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie. He is
wearing an IRS ID badge and dull gray suit. There's a calculator in his
pocket. He has a pencil tucked behind one ear.
"Well, kid," says the genie. "You know how it works. You have three
wishes."
"I'm not falling for this." Says the man. "I'm not going to trust an IRS
auditor."
"What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks
like you're a goner anyway!"
The man thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is
right. "O K, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plentiful food and drink."
***POOF***
The man finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen. And
he is surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.
"OK, kid, what's your second wish."
"My second wish is that I were rich beyond my wildest dreams."
***POOF***
The man finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold
coins and precious gems.
"OK, kid, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!"
After thinking for a few minutes, the man says "I wish that no matter
where I go beautiful women will want and need me."
***POOF***
He is turned into a tampon.
The moral of the story...
If the government offers you anything, there's going to be a string attached. aries- beware of the peanut, for if you choke on it......
taurus- beware of shiny objects and bright lights.
gemini- i detect readings from the seventh house. Stay away from store bought peaches.
cancer- The roads ahead look dangerous. Remember to look both ways.
leo- Stay away from romantic activities or you will fall victim to dandruff and locust invasions.
virgo- Fear the white lion, for he lies in shadow.
libra- The whale and tortoise will give way to better things.
scorpio- Forget not about the roses -- but stray not so far from cattle.
saggitarius- The scholar will call and you may answer the summons.
capricorn- Bicycles and tobacco pose hazard, so keep a sharp mind.
aquarius- The water animals call Luke.... Luke..... i am your father so watch out for this "Luke"
pisces- The rodeo clown has a fondness for pie so bring some not to the car show.
|
|
|
|
Outils 
Aide
